#1. On stage there are three very expensive-looking bottles of Scotch located, appropriately, directly above the baptismal-pool, or what my uncle likes to refer to as, the "church's jacuzzi". Now, it is a distinct possibility that these bottles of Scotch are actually just bottles of piss-colored holy water, but I'm going to stick with Scotch on this one.
#2. Ok. Apparently, during the End of Days God will descend upon earth and raise the deceased, giving them eternal bodies. So in my head, End of Days = Zombie Apocalypse. Am I right? I'm just going by what the man said, and what he described was a Jesus-lead Zombie Apocalypse. Terrifying.
#3. The Priest never sleeps. Well, he does sleep but not in the typical sense. Instead of sleeping 8 hours a night, he takes one minute power naps throughout the day and while on stage. I saw this with my own eyes. Granted, the priest's "praying-face" might just look very similar to his "sleeping-face", but I like to believe that a Priest is more efficient than that. So this nap, combined with other power naps throughout the day allows him to dedicate the full 24-hours of his day to Jesus.
No comments:
Post a Comment